Some very valuable advice men must consider that can help them go through and handle separation consist of the following: always show affection and care for your kids, accept how things are, respect your kids’ mom, be committed to your monetary responsibilities to your children, be true to your other obligations to your kids, reflect and make improvements to yourself, you should not expect too much, and take better care of yourself.
Undergoing separation poses a real challenge fiscally, physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. You may somehow feel emotions of sadness, anger, dejection, and even confusion on how you should handle things. To help you handle and live through separation, here are some valuable and reasonable marriage advice for men you can think about:
Always show affection and care to your children
If you have kids, make it a point to always show to them that you love and care about them. Make sure you tell them I love you and let them hear and really feel it. Show them care and encouragement more than before. Encourage their interests and also go to their school plays, sports tournaments, or other activities, as much as you can. Most of all, communicate to your kids every day. This may not totally make up your absence at home, however, it will certainly let them feel that they will always have a father who never fails to care for them.
Accept how things are
To help you cope with legal separation, you need to be truthful with yourself. You should not pretend everything is the same. Do not avoid the situation. Talk to your partner when there is something you should discuss or vice-versa. Be truthful to your kids, too, particularly when they ask. Do not tell lies or come up with excuses. Be honest in the most constructive way because your kids are also dealing with the situation just like you.
Respect your kids’ mom
Despite having compounded feelings, you should still continue to respect your children’s mother. She is still their mom and that’s how she will always be, so do not attempt to destroy that essential mother-children bond. In order to build a positive relation with your young ones, just be loving and encouraging and not by destroying their mother to get their sympathy.
Be committed to your financial responsibilities to your kid
Once you are legally separated, the law requires you to support your children monetarily. Apart from that, being committed to your monetary responsibility to your children can lead the way to reconciliation in the future, particularly if finances have been an issue. Utilize this moment as your chance to prove that you are financially committed and reliable.
Be committed to your other obligations to your children
Apart from your financial responsibility and the continuous love and attention you show to your kids, make sure you remain true to your other commitments. Simple acts like picking your children from home or school punctually must be done. Visiting schedules and spending time with children need to be faithfully followed. Last but not the least, never make promises to your children you are not sure to keep. Do not get their hopes up too high or you may end up disappointing them, which is only going to give them a harder time dealing with your family situation.
Evaluate and improve yourself
You and your partner may have thought of legal separation rather than a divorce because of different concerns that might still be reconciled. This is the perfect time for you to personally reflect and see exactly how you did your part as a husband as well as a dad. Acknowledge your weak points and faults, but be thankful about your positive attributes. Find out how you can develop yourself, your marital life, and your family as a whole to give your relationship another chance.
Never expect too much
Many legal separations ultimately lead to divorce, so it will be better to set honest expectations. However, this doesn’t mean that you should have a mindset that this situation will end up as divorce. Of course, you should endeavor to make matters work and you still need to hope for a better family, but just to help you deal with separation, do not expect too much.
Look after yourself more
Last but not the least, taking care of yourself can help you handle separation. It may result in good changes and a positive start for you. Following a good diet, sleeping enough, not stressing out, pursuing sports, occasionally spending time with peers, quitting harmful habits like smoking or drinking too much, and keeping your room clean, can help you deal with the situation and start a brand new you.
Separation is a situation you cannot evade, therefore you must handle it. You can use your coming days to make your life completely miserable or consider this an opportunity to make things better and start a new you. You choose.